Tara's G-Spot - Assassin's Creed: Nothing is True, Everything is Awesome by Tara Babcock - www.impulsegamer.com


I figured I would start off this article with an image. Assassin's Creed is highly praised, but it is nothing without its breathtaking scenery and visuals.

What do you think of when you recall your experience playing through the Assassin's Creed franchise? Do you think of Altair redeeming his title as master assassin of Masyaf through remorseless slaughter of major Templars, while traversing the vast lands of the Kingdom of Jerusalem? Maybe you envision Ezio Auditore instead, growing up in a twisted world of betrayal, entangled in a bloodline and forced as a teenager to learn the ways of the brotherhood, becoming a skilled assassin? Perhaps you remember the snippets of the present-day Desmond Miles as he discovers he is a descendent of some of the most powerful assassins in history? I simply fell in love with the game as a whole and its vast open environments and smooth parkour style, in a unique stealth and action combination seldom seen in gaming history. I adore the characters' honesty and struggle... and the badassery of a hidden bladed, snowy cloaked figure descending like an eagle from the rooftops; piercing his enemy through the throat, of course! Assassin's creed wowed me with its incredible revolutionary graphics and the freedom it allows through interacting with the game's entire universe. It immersed me wholly into the rich, emotional plotline, and captivated me to move further into the story, leaving me hungrier for more with the completion of each installment. On top of that, were the countless puzzles that made me enamored in its mystery. Assassin's Creed is one of those games with a story in a story inside of a story, and I would never get enough of the enticing gameplay and extras! What's your excuse for AC addiction?

The Papal guards are so hot! For the longest time I thought "Papal" meant sexy... then I realized they only guard the Pope's place. Ah, I jest. I love their brute size and speed! That armor is awesome!

Oh my god... did I mention Papal guards!?


"Nothing is true, everything is permitted", thus is the maxim of the Order of Assassins. Remembering that always will help to honor the brotherhood and complete each mission assigned to you. As an assassin, you must follow a simple creed that emphasizes three key elements to what a true assassin must uphold. First, stay your blade from the flesh of an innocent. If one is not corrupt, one's life shall not be taken. Peace, though something of a paradox, is an assassin's main objective. The second rule of the creed is hiding in plain sight. A truly skilled assassin can make cover out of any object, and blend into any of his surroundings. The last, and one of the most important segments, is to never, for any reason, bring harm to the brotherhood, whether intentional or otherwise. An elite member of the Order will be bludgeoned to a bloody and honorable death before they spill any secret information that could harm their brethren. Thus is the assassin's creed!

Altair, about to gut a Templar guard in the Holy Land like a pro!

The Assassin's Creed series follows Desmond Miles, a twenty-something year old man living in the year 2012, who is abducted by a modern-day Templar group, Abstergo, in order to probe his inherited memory DNA in hopes of securing a "Piece of Eden". Desmond, who looks uncannily like Adam Sandler (which is a total turn off!), soon finds out that his ancestors Altair, and later, Ezio, were part of the elite Order of Assassins, and is forced to relive their memories through a machine called the Animus. The first game follows Altaļr Ibn-La'Ahad through his careless fall from brotherhood graces and his ascension back up in rank. Successive series additions, however, focus on Ezio Auditore da Firenze from birth (litterally!) to old age. There are many appearances of Altair in the handheld and side games, such as the mobile and Facebook titles, though! Throughout the historically correct storyline Desmond experiences the "bleeding effect", allowing him to slowly learn the ways of the assassin, the street running and butchering skills passed down throughout his bloodline. Current Templar associates and assassins are competing to locate the hidden Piece of Eden, which holds unprecedented mystical powers, using poor Desmond's inherited memory strands. Without spoiling the spellbinding story too much, it's notable that the present, past, somewhat supernatural, and even the historically educational plots come together so harmoniously; it's akin to having several separate and spectacular games per release! So far, not only has AC put developer and publisher, Ubisoft, on the map, it has brought more than nine titles to more than five platforms since its first debut in 2007. AC games have made it onto the PC, Playstation 3 and Xbox, PSP and Nintendo DS, mobile phones, and even on Facebook with Assassin's Creed: Project Legacy.

Never did like playing games on Facebook, but the little I did play of this was pretty good for a FB app!

On top of all of the excitement of the most recent installment, Brotherhood, such as the ability to run the entire city through courtesan brothels, thieves and mercenaries guilds, even Ezio's own guild of assassins, there was also an award winning and rich online multiplayer feature. In this component, you take on the persona of a recruit Templar in the Abstergo facility, and you utilize different modes of "virtual training" for future besting of assassins out in the real world. You earn experience, unlock costumes and characters, and you even level up and gain new abilities. Among my favorites is the ability to shape shift into another character to avoid revelation. Deception is definitely my favorite tactic!

The Hellequins were the sexiest online Characters. I loved the Knight and the Courtesan too!

Personally, what I find most wonderful about Assassin's Creed may not be the entangled stories or the precedent-setting graphic beauty mixed with assassination-al badassery and brutality (surprisingly), but rather, Ubisoft's ability to improve so drastically game to game. The original Assassin's Creed in 2007 definitely knocked my socks off. It was incredibly original, interesting and catchy, but even though I was completely dependent on the game and its spying, deadly "interrogations", eavesdropping, and constant traversing of lands, it was quite repetitive. Through talking to some of the gamers I know, I found that not everyone fell for its charms enough to give the subsequent installments a chance. This saddens me, as I have honestly never played through a franchise that was as good at cleaning up their act with each new game as Assassin's Creed. Any glitches were fixed, all of the new ideas I thought they could add while playing the first game; added. The repetition of the game was minimized and finally removed all together by Brotherhood, the ridiculous American accents were eliminated, and video game perfection had been reached! I recently went back to replay the first game as a refresher for my article and, lo and behold, the game I was once addicted to had become a disgusting pile of rubbish. This wasn't because it shape shifted or anything impossible, it was simply because the sequels are just that good! Another innovative thing I love about the games, from the second on, is the historical info you can find in the menu on all of the characters you meet and places you visit. No, not the boring stuff you would find in literature, it's actually juicy and filled with drama... and factual! In addition, since it is an open mapped game, and is so geographically accurate, I really felt connected with the characters, locale and story. I wanted to actually go to Italy! Merda, I even learned a little of the native tongue! I could go on about the reasons I love the parkour adventure, climbing up and diving from incredible heights, massacring, sex scene-ing rated M-ness of AC, but I'm pretty sure my word counter would explode before I finished! If you have not, it is vital that you find out why AC scored in the eighties and nineties across the board, not only in my book ("You here to look at the book?" Haha!), but unanimously among all gaming sites and publications!

I even ended up falling in love with the Sandler-esque Ezio after his showing of true manliness (refer to the third Cristina mission... so sexy!), coupled with all of that brutish and cunning assassination business!

Marvelously enough, the newest addition to the AC franchise, Revelations, is hitting the stores in the US November 15th of this year! Ubisoft has most definitely chosen the perfect time for release, only five days after my birthday, which will leave just enough space to end the festivities and get back into gaming mode! Revelations shows a lot of promise and brings a lot of anticipation, despite little being yet known about the actual happenings within the game. Ezio is older now, and is in search of more information about his bloodline and the Order. He's fueled by visions of Altair and all three generations of the ancestry are said to play a large part in this newest release. I can't wait to see what new and awe-inspiring features, locations, characters and developments Revelations will bring! Best to stay tuned... I've even heard talk of an Assassin's Creed III with a whole new protagonist in the works! 


Firstly, I'd like to address the very first ever Ask Tara fan question! Yes, we've reached a pivotal and ground-breaking milestone here, people! The most intriguing question, chosen by my awesome editor, was, "Which game would you most like to see a remake of?" Well, I'd have to go with Final Fantasy VII, and I think a good portion of the gaming community will agree with me. The Final Fantasy franchise itself is one of the most adored names in the industry and VII definitely takes the cake. It's got the cult following of fans that still play through it, including me, despite the horrible outdated graphics and pixelation. Based off of that knowledge, and the fact that I've seen numerous petitions for a modern remake, I know a remastered Final Fantasy VII would be a complete hit! I'd better see more questions spawn off of your guys' brilliant craniums before my next article! Go now!

Now, for some personal Tara info! I'm flying out to Tampa, Florida in one day! I am super busy and stressing to get everything together in time, but I know it's been a while since I've added a new installment to my gaming articles here at Impulse Gamer, so I decided to force myself to finish one for you guys before I take off! I've been putting off the Assassin's Creed article because I never really felt like my skills could truly encompass the brilliance that is AC! Plus, I've been really busy getting things ready for this trip and my Glamourcon event trip in November, as well as my birthday on November 10th! Really, though, I am not excited about turning 22! Getting old really sucks!

Keep an eye out on my website for lots of brand new photo album sets under my "Photos" tab, as I'll be shooting a ton and traveling even more. I know you guys will love it!

Here's an image I shot last time I was in Tampa for a publication called STROBE Magazine! I'm not a big fan of the raccoon eyes, though! 

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Follow Tara at her official website, www.tarababcock.com




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